Day 88 // The Shift

 

October 3rd changed everything – I can no longer deny it. For the past seven days my thoughts and emotions have been on a never ending Diamondback ride.

Last Saturday, David and I were invited by our good friends to attend the Pink Ribbon Girl Fundraiser. Hearing numerous stories of women battling cancer sent my head into a tailspin – no longer did I feel alone in my struggles. We were both deeply touched, yet shaken. And on the drive home, as we discussed what we took away from the event, David made a statement that honestly halted every inch of me in my tracks.

“From the onset of your diagnosis to your chemo treatments and now radiation, I have never viewed you as sick. Your strength has convinced me, Gia and others that you are almost invincible-like. And the alternative has never crossed my mind.”

I thank David for what anyone would consider an immense compliment. Yet, reality had sunk in with both of us that night and the “alternative” became the white elephant in the car.

Yes, I have portrayed some level of invincibility – needing to for myself, Gia, David, family and friends, and for business. Reassuring everyone that I would be OK and that nothing would stop me was the thing to do – right?

But after his statement, my thoughts immediately were on Wonder Woman – warrior princess, powerful defender of peace, swift, strong, beautiful. Is that really me? I have hopes…fears…dreams…and shed tears – does she? Wonder Woman saves cities and helps nations. I just help other women be the best versions of themselves. I’m certainly not her, but without being “me,” the Wonder Woman persona does not exist.

Being Beth – as true to myself as possible – only feeds the power of Wonder Woman each day. While I’ve attempted to minimize the down days, they provide the continual strength to move forward, fighting harder for what I want and believe in. My life is not infinite and no longer do I hold the expectation of “forever.” But while I walk this earth, it is my mission to make a difference in others, including my family, and help as many as possible while maintaining some level of invincibility through this journey. Because if you believe in yourself, then anything is possible.

Wonder Woman does – so why can’t I? And why not you?